Sharing.

There is a saying;

"Share too much, and you might get hurt"

Indeed. I can say, I couldn't agree more.

It has been hard for me to share my thoughts, my feelings, my emotions with people around me lately. To make it worst, it has been hard for me to gain trusts. No, not from you, neither from the others, but from me, myself. I'm not sure since when. I don't even know why. I feel wrong to share. Like, sharing is a crime where the one who might get killed is me. Some people, some of my friends get hurt by my act. I feel guilty.

But that was then.

I've been thinking, I've been creating the possible what ifs in my mind that make me feel it's somehow, 'OK' not to share.

First, what if I share it wrongly? And by wrongly I mean, the stories inside my mind are not synced perfectly with my tongue which then lead to an even more complicated situation where the listener might get it wrong, interpret it badly, and such. At this point, for me to explain it again from the very start could be hard and tiresome. Duhh.

Second, what if the one who's asking, is not the one who really want to listen? To believe it or not, there are lots of this kind of people out there. They can be just right besides me now. They can be one of my girlfriends/boyfriends either. They're asking, not because they care. They're asking, not because they wanna know for real. They're asking, not because they really wanna listen to me. They're just asking. JUST asking. They're JUST asking, because they feel bored. They're JUST asking, because they feel wrong for not to ask. They're JUST asking, because they love to pretend like they care. They're JUST asking, because they wanna judge me and my life. They're JUST asking, because they want to make fun of my stories. Stupid bunch of people, really. They're JUST asking, because they're out of stories to share with their moron friends. Moroners, heh. They're JUST asking, because, well, I don't know. Maybe because they wanna stab my back someday? Ouch. Be careful. Parasites everywhere. Share too much and you might get kill. Ugh.

Last but not least, what if the so called sharing that I thought would be between the two people; just you and me, turns out to be 'are you kidding me? Not only you and me ! But, you, me, and them ! Everyone ! Hahaha !' The heck ? -.-

Look. What ifs are only what ifs. Possibilities. It's okay to share, of course. Sharing is caring. Sharing is loving. Only when you do it at the right time, at the right moment, at the right place, and with the right person. Yep. In short, only when you do it right. And let me add, I share when I feel like I wanted to. I don't share when I have to, cause some things are meant to be kept. So I guess it should be okay sometimes. Chill.

(: